Summer is here, finally

Boy, what a wet and cold spring we had. One of the creeks that run through town flooded because of the late and large snowpack melting, flooding 10 houses, and causing a mudslide. Luckily the other creeks, including the one behind our house, are fine.

The garden is in. well, half of it, anyway. the big pile of sticks is still there, so only one half is garden. I have tomatoes (which are not doing well), beans (doing great. 2 types with red or mauve flowers making a tipi), strawberries, herbs for my hubby, raspberries, blueberries, and flowers. First garden in a long time. I put in some flat rocks to make a hap-hazard path, and the kids are out there all the time playing with their toys. Beautiful.

Hubby is having a very hard time at work. So unhappy and stressed out. Talks about ending it all a lot. Before it was just walking away from everything (including us). Now its past that. We are hoping that things change in the fall, and I'm pushing for him to change companies. If things don't change, I will have to push hard for him to find something else, no matter how it affects our finances. I hate pushing, and he HATES being pushed. Should be interesting!

Kids are well, pets are well. I have started my daycare, am loving it like crazy. Hope against hope that it all works out, sometimes it doesn't. But I am in a good space right now, very happy and content.

hmmmmmm

I finally have a minute to sit and think. it has been awhile. I was sick for 5 weeks, finally recovering. That is the hazard of going in cold to a room with 16 preschoolers - every germ and bacteria finds the one person not used to them all!

I have yet to get out to the garden, but we have grown seedlings at preschool - some of which i get to plant in the garden in a few weeks. I also have to remove a LARGE pile of branches, dig half a garden plot of dirt into another plot, mix both with a load of new dirt, fix the fence, build a sand box, and then plant something.

small boy and middle girl are playing soccer now. yesterday it snowed at the start of practice. its probably good i haven't planted anything yet! frost last night, too.

I am confused these days - how do you interpret fate, or the universe, or the 'signs'. I have my daycare ready to go, but i was getting stressed because i was unsure i could do it well. Then i was offered 2 jobs - both of which were amazingly wonderful opportunities. Yet i am clinging to this daycare. I have always been given what i need by the universe, just when i need it. so are these jobs my 'out' from a situation which is not good? or is my daycare what i should be doing? hmmmmmm. am i being stubborn and clinging to the familiar, afraid to push myself? or am i making a wise decision that means i can be home for my family? hmmmmmmm. too many pros and cons to each. i feel like that cartoon where he says "give me a sign", then disregards them all. i hope there are redo's . . . 

Spring is coming

Wow, its been awhile since I've posted. Either too busy to spend the time, or too melancholy from reading blogs with sick children. I really need to post before I read about Ivy and Veronica and Katie. Or think about the ones I know around here. The worlds troubles just weigh on my shoulders at night.

Life is much the same as it always is, in our corner of the world.

Big girl is homeschooling this year. She finds the public school system too frustrating - her brain thinks at problems backwards than most people, so it takes her a long time to get the concept you are trying to teach her, and she cannot write down an answer properly, so it cannot be marked right. Homeschool went well until Jan., when she got sick for 4 weeks. During that time she got hooked on watching anime shows on her laptop in her room. Oh, the struggle to get her to come join us in the real world again! Just like when she was a toddler/preschooler/child/preteen - so resistant to change and transition. Slowly seeing the light come on in her eyes again, but she has taken to posting on facebook - i want to go live with my dad, i can't take it anymore, I have to get out of here. People are understandably getting worried about her. I'm slightly embarrassed whenever I read the posts and peoples comments. Teenagers . . .

Little girl is doing well, keeping herself busy skiing, skating, playing indoor soccer, building snow forts. Health is good this year, and she is happy.

Little boy is doing well. Seemed to have no seizures over the winter, may have just started them again. They seem to not affect him much, his physical development is fine, his academics are fine. We drove 5 hours in the fall for an appointment, the truck broke down, I had 3 kids and a dog - so no bus home. We stayed in a hotel for 2 nights, one of hubby's friends thankfully came and picked us up. The truck stayed in the far-away town for over a month, leaving me with no vehicle, then I took the bus to pick it up when it was finally fixed. I don't think I'll go back unless I have too!

Hubby is still up north working. He just about went off the deep end after xmas, seems better now. Is making an effort to come home more. He was away for 30 to 40 days at a time, 86 in the summer in one stretch, but it was too much. We will just make do with less money.

I am working in childcare again. I needed a job quickly, and its easy for me to get a job - I have so much experience. I have been trying to get out of the field for years, for personal reasons, but I'm back in. I'm liking it, but treading on tip-toe and keeping it at arms length still. Hope I will settle in by summer, and that it all goes well.

CMT update - losing muscle in my hands. My left pinkie has trouble making the 'a' and 'shift' as I type, have to keep going back, lol. Broke my foot in the fall, tripping. It healed well, but I may have not enough calcium in my bones since it broke so easily.

very funny story . . . I was walking the dogs with my kids at my parents farm when i tripped. they ran to a neighbours house and i got a ride home (they had to walk the dogs back, ha ha). I hopped around on it for a couple of days, using a paddle as a crutch. Then my sister, who is a doctor, said I should get it checked - it was probably broken, from my symptoms. That day, big girl ended up in hospital for 3 days with an asthma attack, brought on by doing the barn chores for me. While i was overnight with big girl, bears got into my parents chicken coop and killed 50 chickens. so i was scrambling up and down hills on my knees (sore foot), picking up chicken parts and fixing fences/walls for 2 days. I got an x-ray, and it was broken - i got a walking cast and real crutches.

I still had it when the truck broke down and we had to walk everywhere for over a month. I walked more with the broken foot, than i had for months before i broke it! i think that is why it healed so well though, lots of blood flow.

we are definitely into spring here - today it rained, then snowed, was gloriously warm and sunny, then a blizzard came in for an hour. it is both slickly icy and sloppily slushy on the roads. so fun. but we are thinking about gardens. The tide has turned, and spring is coming.