What a bizarre week

The week before Hallowe'en never seemed to end.

Sunday my mom came from her home 4 hours away to look after my 3 kids for 2 days while hubby and I went to vancouver for baby tests. I'd been sick for a week because the amniotic fluid was building up, and pushing on my organs - my lungs filled up and I wasn't breathing properly, I couldn't eat much, my legs swelled alarmingly, I couldn't sleep from the pains in my chest.

The flight Monday was very turbulent, and I had major chest pains.

Tuesday we went in to the hospital for tests, and they discovered that Christopher had already passed away - sunday or monday, i guess. I had to decide if we were going to have the baby that night in vancouver, or take our flight home the next day and have the baby in our hometown (I really wanted the kids to have a chance to see him.) The hospital in our town couldn't take me for a few days, and hubby and family really didn't think they could take the stress for another week, so I decided to have the baby in vancouver.

The birth was amazing, so like all my others. Christopher was put immediately on my chest, just like the others. I cooed over his little hands and feet, exclaimed over how much he looked like his dad, was proud of how big he was, just like the others.

I spent the whole day waiting for the moment when he would taken away for the autopsy. I hadn't quite realized that he would be gone forever until then. But we were able to get a photographer to come from 'Now i lay me down to sleep', and we made foot and handprints. So we have some mementos to show the kids.

The next two days were spent in Easter Seal House, waiting for a flight home. And my hubby got a call from his boss - don't come back to work, you've just had your contract cancelled because some clients are upset that you are not available. Ummm, aren't you supposed to be covering for him?!?!?!?! So now neither of us have a job.

And to top it off, there was a mistake with our flight home. We got to the airport, expecting to arrive home just in time to go trick-or-treating with the kids, but our flight had already left. So we ended up in a hotel for another night. By the time we got finally got home, my mom was exhausted, my oldest was a mess of nerves, and the younger two were so relieved to see us they clamped onto me and didn't let go for hours.

We are just savoring being together right now.